I'm on the edge of something. I can feel the scales wanting to teeter, which is a good thing. I'm walking a path that I can't quite see, but like Doctorow said about writing, you may only be able to see as far as your headlights go, but you can make the entire journey that way. My headlights tend to be a bit short-sighted, but the difference now is that my faith keeps me on this path, even when I can only see a few inches in front of me.
Of course, my friends have helped me see a little farther than I normally would. It's funny... In the difficult moments I still have, the phone always rings at the right time, or someone I feel I need to talk to pops online, or someone will say the just-right thing to keep me afloat and remind me that things are not as bad as they seem.
Hopefully this isn't too much like rambling, but I'm more grateful than I can say for the people God's sent my way. Everything's not roses and rainbows and all that good stuff, but in the midst of the difficulty and pain, good things are shining through. This has been an terrible and an amazing time.
I'm growing, y'all. And it's exciting. Difficult at times, but exciting. Just in time for 30....
Now for some departing words from Lauryn:
Everything is everything
What is meant to be will be
After winter must come spring
Change it comes eventually
;)
J
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